Lost

…. Please dont takes my sunshine away.

Mommy who is going to take me away?

No one, it’s just a song

I wont ever go away I promise. Well just for school but then I will come home.  And  If I get lost I will find a mommy or a daddy or a uniform with kids and tell them to call you.

That’s right.  If you get lost you find a mommy or a daddy with little kids or someone in a uniform and you tell them to call me.  Whats my phone number?

888

801, I interrupt her

No don’t say it.  I will say it.

She got it right the second time.  This is a recurring conversation with my four-year old.  She is terrified of getting lost or of loosing her family.  I try to reassure her that if she ever gets lost that she knows just what to do.  That I will always be her mommy.  That if she ever got lost that I would find her.  That if she would pay attention and stay close to me in the store she would never need to worry about getting lost.  But its useless.   She has nightmares, her barbie’s get lost when she plays, I can’t sing her favorite song without a discussion, she is afraid.

And why shouldnt she be afraid.  She lost her daddy, then she lost her mommy, then she lost her sister.  She knows loss.

I remind her of when we got adopted.  I remind her that the judge said that I am her mama forever and that papa is her papa forever.  I remind her of when Benni got out and we drove in the car and found him and he was so happy to see us and got right in and gave her big Benni tong kisses.   And it seems to help for a minute.

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By orderfromthechaos

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